Wednesday, November 20, 2013

WNBP: So...Where Were We?

I know.  It's been longer than the usual Sheepish Blogging Lapse.  I'd make some creative excuse, but I think by now you've heard most of the good ones.  Anything I try at this juncture would just sound kind of pathetic.  I think we're all better than that...

So, in the interest of forging ahead as if nothing happened at all, here is your somewhat belated Wednesday Night Bullet Post:

*The past two Thursdays have involved Parent/Teacher Conference Nights.

*Because we have a delayed start on Thursdays, the powers that be decided staff should come in two hours late and stay two hours longer to accommodate the need to chat with parents.

*No impact to students.  A little extra sleep for the staff.

*In theory.  

*Da Boyz don't know from parent/teacher conferences so they had me up bright and early just as if I wasn't being gifted with two hours of relaxation before the official start of the day.

*Tomorrow is Thursday.  But there are no conferences.

*They expect us to come in at the usual time for staff meetings.

*Which strikes me as somewhat unreasonable...

*I came home today to discover that The Absurdly Gi-normous Kitty had turned on the air conditioning.

*This was highly unnecessary given that it is November.

*And probably ill advised since I've also removed the exhaust hose from the window.

*He had no comment on the matter.

*And yes.   I am certain that it was the AGK.  It's always the AGK.  

*No matter what happens, it is the AGK.  

*Plus I've seen him do it before.

*I should just unplug it, I suppose.  That would solve the problem.

*But when I think of it, I am not in a position to actually do it.

*And when I could handily reach the plug, the urgency of the situation isn't quite the same.

*I used to have a Cheerful Teaching Assistant.

*I was there when The Cheerful Teaching Assistant first made the decision to move in with her boyfriend.

*I was there when she got the ring.

*I was there when she planned the wedding and congratulated her when she returned to school after the nuptials were done.

*I was there when she bought her house.

*I was there for lots and lots of stuff.  Now she works at the high school.

*So I wasn't there when she had her baby girl and I had to find out about it after the fact like everyone else.

*Which is a little sad, but not so much so that I'm not over the moon thrilled for her.  I even found a pattern for a crocheted baby sacque thingie and I might even get it done before the kid heads off for college.

*If nothing else, I like the idea of a baby in a "sacque."  It's honestly and truly called a sacque!

*I decided that it was time to do a little work on the ol' hair color last weekend.  Even got a bit bold with it.  

*Went waaaaay too dark.  I mean waaaaaaaaaaay.

*All I could think when I was done was, "Look!  It's Elvira!

*That was Saturday.  Sunday was for fixing what havoc I'd wrought.  Time to bust out the color remover!

*I've been coloring my hair since I was in my mid-twenties not so much out of need as because I think it's awesome to live in an age where such things are possible. 

* I've experienced my share of disasters.

*Color remover is tricky, but living like the Dark Queen Of The Deepest Night seemed even trickier.  I simply don't have the wardrobe for it and maintaining a glower for hours on end is exhausting.

*Not to mention how out of practice I am with the Expected Evil Laugh...

*With a bit of skill, a smidgen of courage and no small amount of luck, I was able to time it out to the point that I removed the worst of the offending darkness in the top layer.  That was enough.  The darker underside is the sort of thing I can claim to have done on purpose.  

*Helpful Hint From Someone Who Knows Hair Disasters:  Always do the strand test when using color remover.  I actually needed far less time than the box indicated.

*Of course, it probably would have also been helpful to do a strand test before I dyed my hair the color of deepest, darkest, reddish evil, but that is something I don't think we need to dwell on.

*I was going to do a re-color, but I think it's best to let my hair recover a bit before plunging back into the whole activity again.

*Our new school staff rules have strongly advised us against posting information online about students.  
*Although I've been careful over the years, I like being employed enough that I'm going to do my best to comply.

*However, I cannot go another minute without sharing the following information.

*There is a kid in my class with the biggest sty in his eye that I have ever seen.  I mean EVER.

*It's the size of a commercially grown blueberry.  Except it's not blue.  It's red and he can't even keep his eye open.  I am afraid of it.

*I keep thinking it's going to suddenly start speaking to me.  Perhaps hint that it is planning some sort of world domination maneuver...

*I'm also afraid that the thing is going to burst right there in the middle of my classroom and I've already announced to anyone who will listen that, should this happen, I am done.

*I will retire on the spot because there is just no coming back from that.

*Insert horrified shiver here.

*On a lighter note, the school cafeteria served their yearly turkey dinner to the kids today.  Early, I know but you can't argue with a turkey dinner no matter when it lands in your lap.

*I don't eat cafeteria food even though I know all the staff personally and love them to death.

*So I stood there throughout my lunch duty smelling turkey and practically floating towards the kitchen like some old timey cartoon character.

*I ended up spending almost ten bucks on a cooked and ready to eat turkey breast at the grocery store on the way home.  

*Which seems crazy now that I'm all full of turkey but I still can't bring myself to regret it.

*I've been making cranberry sauce and canning it so there is almost a logical pattern to the turkey purchase.

*I've never liked whole berry cranberry sauce.  Or at least that's what I thought.

*Upon further consideration, I believe that I never actually ate whole berry cranberry sauce.  Now that I've made my own, I suspect that I actually really like the stuff.

*If my consumption of it is any indication...

I am reasonably sure that there is lots more going on here, but I can't seem to think of anything at the moment.  I am also pretty certain that this is one of the more random bullet posts I've thrown out there in a while but I don't think you can blame me for that.  It's been two weeks since I've put cursor to screen and I can't even begin to recall where I left off.

 I think I'm going to go pick a few more morsels off my Very Expensive Turkey Breast and toss a little more deep conditioner onto my locks.  Now that I think of it, I should probably do another circuit around the manse to see if my darling cat has managed to figure out how to trip any other appliances.

Well, would you look at that!  Remembering to blog is good.  It reminds me of all sorts of other stuff I should probably be remembering to do...



Elaine said...

I'm so glad you're back! Happy Turkey days!

=Tamar said...

Relieved that you've returned.
Unplug the air conditioner. You know it's the only way.
Also, you need to plan a way to prevent him from doing it again, because if he can turn it on, he can turn it off, probably on the hottest day of the summer.

A sty that size should probably be seen by a doctor, from what I read on Wikipedia.

Anonymous said...

Glad you're back! missed you. Also miss your reading lis... would never have found Sandman Slim without it.

I'm with Tamar, unplug the AC - it's way to cold already!


Julia G said...

Congratulations to the CTA ! I'm making a baby gift too, a Wonderful Wallaby - always a hit and quick enough so the kid should get it before high school :-) Elvira Red sounds like an awesome hair color! It's probably outside your jurisdiction, but warm salt water compresses 3 x day do the trick for styes - plus taking frequent breaks from staring at the computer screen, because you blink less often and tear less. I used to dislike cranberry sauce too, until I made it from the recipe on the back of the fresh cranberry bag - tastes great and ridiculously easy to make. Hope you and da Boyz have a great Thanksgiving!

Anonymous said...

Are you ok? Miss you!


Anonymous said...

SHEEPIE! Are you ok? Have power? We miss you!!!